TINA “KNOWLEDGEABLE” PEDEN’S POP CULTURE DICTIONARY (VOLUME 15) WHAT IS FRIGIDAIRE HEMORRHAGE?


(Definition) Frigidaire Hemorrhage is a sudden bursting of a blood vessel due to extreme anger over an inconsiderate or lazy-ass family member putting an almost empty ice tray back into the refrigerator. Although this condition has the possibility to become fatal if not treated it can often be avoided by simply filling up the DAMN ice tray with water, lemonade, Pepsi, gin & tonic or any other liquid substance but preferably water when it’s empty before putting it back into the DAMN refrigerator!

I will now use this term in a couple of sentences to clarify it’s meaning.

“After Maggie O’Gutsery was released from St. Patrick’s Day Memorial Hunter Green Hospital after an almost fatal Frigidaire Hemorrhage against doctor’s and her clergyman’s orders she hightailed it down to Pat O’Shalley’s Restaurant & Tavern and ordered a big-ass bloody mary filled with 11 cubes of ice from a 12 cube ice tray to calm her nerves before she went home to deal with her soon to be ex-husband.”

“Grandma Jackson happily ignored the Frigidaire Hemorrhage-like looks that her usually loving family gave her that night when she used up almost 15 trays of ice cubes to cool down her smoking feet due to jumping on them all day because of her massive bingo win earlier that day.”

“Still recovering from a mild case of Frigidaire Hemorrhage, Jonah had his college’s mascot, Squirt the bulldog, piss all over his dad’s eighteen century antique one of a kind desk in retaliation for coming over the night before and using practically all of the ice cubes in his small-ass dormitory fridge for a minor head wound that he sustained in a car accident that night that almost killed him rendering Jonah unable to make his famous ultra cool mint melt in your mouth pencil dick shaped jello shots for the freshman that were pledging his fraternity later that night.”

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