RETRO PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION GEMS: WHY AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW THAT DICK CHENEY HAS HIS OWN OFFICIAL VICE PRESIDENTIAL DIGS?


This is a piece that I wrote back in May 2008 on Instablogs for the 2008 Presidential Election. So jump into the retro time machine and enjoy a gem from 2008!

Hey!

Am I the only person in the United States of America who didn’t know that there was a Vice Presidential Mansion?

I feel so dumb!

I feel so left out!

I’m really hurt!

To think that I had to hear about this interesting fact on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno while he was telling a joke!

How come they didn’t teach this stuff back in the 70’s when I was in elementary school!

Damn catholic schools!

Why am I always the last to know things!

Why couldn’t I have read it in a text book in school just like everybody else!

Why must I always be left out of the loop!

I’m really hurt!

In fact, i’m devastated!

I just hope I have the fortitude to finish writing this story.

(Okay Tina, enough of this pity party, you can do it! Channel your emotions and finish writing this story! Okay?)

(Okay!)

P.S. I was briefly talking to myself but that’s over with now and i’m talking to you.

Anyhoo back to the show!

I mean, I knew that the Vice President lived somewhere, I knew the guy wasn’t exactly homeless or anything but I never thought that he had his own OFFICIAL residence!

It just sounds so formal!

You go, boy!

No offense to the Veep an all, but for me, i’m mostly all about the President and think of our Vice President as an afterthought.

But this whole Vice Presidential mansion thing has me looking at this guy in a whole new light.

I feel kinda’ proud of the guy.

Go figure!

Hey!

For those of you out there like me who also didn’t know that the Veep had an official residence either here’s a little info.

His digs are called Number One Observatory Circle.

A weird name I first thought too until I found out that the joint was located on the grounds of the United States Naval Observatory in Washington D.C. hence the name.

Duh!

The house was built in 1893 and Vice President Walter Mondale was the first Veep to live in the house full-time and every Veep since then has lived at Number One Observatory Circle.

Cool beans!

Gee whiz, why am I always the last person to know about things!

I just hope that there’s nothing else about the Veep that I don’t know.

If Dick Cheney has an Air Force 2 airplane or a tacky intern mistress ala’ Monica Lewinsky that everybody else knows about but me, i’m going to be totally pissed!

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