Archive for May, 2012

THE UNOFFICIAL WORDPRESS/FEDERATED MEDIA SWEET TRI-PARTNERSHIP SONG!


Two weeks ago, I received an email that my blog had been accepted into the WordAds Program and I was estatic! And i’m happy to say that two weeks later after having the advertisements on my blog I can’t tell you how impressed I am with the advertisements themselves!

WordPress and Federated Media I just want to say to you guys that the advertisements look fantastic! They don’t look cheap or tacky like some blogs that I have seen with advertising. I really appreciate it!

And I am sooo looking forward to making a little extra cash from this tri-partnership with you guys. And to get the party started and to show you my thanks, here is a little song that I wrote just for you WordPress and Federated Media. And it goes a little something like this………………….

The Unofficial WordPress/Federated Media Sweet Tri-Partnership Song!

(Chorus)

Federated Media,

Federated Media,

Federated Media,

And the website, WordPress not the WikiPedia,

The place where blogs make good ol’ advertising bucks,

And in this economy having no extra money really sucks,

Sweet tri-partnership with you is lucrative baby, cash deluxe,

WordAds Program, I love and thank you, keep up the good work, bashful smile, and a big ol’ aww shucks!

WordPress and Federated Media to put it plainly, thank you sooo much for the extra advertising bucks!

(Verse 1)

Hey world, three for one and one for all,

I said, three for one and one for all,

WordPress and Federated Media’s new motto on this venture they proudly call,

And WordPress Bloggers are the third partner on this venture and the three of us are gonna’ have a ball,

Because with Federated Media’s acquisition of sites like FoodBuzz they are now the internet advertising king,

Many marketers will seek out WordPress and it’s bloggers to sell their wares on their blogs with a little spice and zing,

But don’t you worry WordPress Bloggers, Federated Media won’t stop there they will continue to grow and spread their wings,

So to a long sweet profitable tri-partnership between Federated Media, WordPress and WordPress Bloggers I happily foresee and loudly sing!

(Chorus)

Federated Media,

Federated Media,

Federated Media,

And the website, WordPress not the WikiPedia,

The place where blogs make good ol’ advertising bucks,

And in this economy having no extra money really sucks,

Sweet tri-partnership with you is lucrative baby, cash deluxe,

WordAds Program, I love and thank you, keep up the good work, bashful smile, and a big ol’ aww shucks!

WordPress and Federated Media to put it plainly, thank you sooo much for the extra advertising bucks!

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TINA “KNOWLEDGEABLE” PEDEN’S POP CULTURE DICTIONARY (VOLUME 12) WHAT IS THE RUBBING ALCOHOL RUSE?


(Definition) The Rubbing Alcohol Ruse is a devilishly clever code strategy that a sneaky-ass man or woman perpetrates by deliberately writing down the item, “rubbing alcohol” as a simple reminder to themselves to buy a large-ass quantity of liquor on their grocery lists in lieu of writing down the actual words vodka, Jim Beam, tequila, Jack Daniels or whatever the hell other spirit that the sneaky-ass man or woman wants to buy in order to cover their ass just in case any other pain-in-the-ass person in their life should see the grocery list such as a member of the clergy, the family doctor or a nosy-ass co-worker who’ll no doubt think that the sneaky-ass man or woman is a closeted alcoholic lush for buying so much booze and will no doubt joyfully spread this news to every Tom, Dick and Harry that they know or give communion wafers to thereby forcing the sneaky-ass man or woman to take the diabolic route to buying the intoxicants that they so desperately love.

I will now use this phrase in a sentence to clarify it’s meaning.

GROCERY LIST:

-Tomatoes

-Black Olives

-Lean Ground Beef

-Lettuce

-Cheddar Cheese

-Sour Cream

-Taco Sauce

-Hard & Soft Taco Shells

-Rubbing Alcohol (Invisible i.e. all the liquor I need to make those lethal-ass grandpa margaritas)

-Onion

-Tortilla Chips

-Guacamole

Father Breckinmeyer, it was so good of you to stop by! And by the by, before you leave can you do me a favor and please hand me my grocery list that’s being held securely by that big ol’ happy face magnet on the refrigerator? You see Father, i’m making tacos for dinner tonight and I will simply be cross with myself if I forget a single item (i.e. the booze for the grandpa margaritas) on my grocery list.

(Innocent smile flashed to the priest by the perpetrator and a low-down dirty snicker that no man of the cloth could possibly hear! Oh God! Oh Jesus! Oh how I simply adore The Rubbing Alcohol Ruse! Another low-down dirty snicker!)

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SHAMROCK GIRL QUOTES (QUOTE 10)


Quote from Jannah Janu of The Adventures of Shamrock Girl series,  “Yes I do! I speak english! I’m not dumb!”

To read the comic book style short story in which this quote came from please click, Shamrock Girl & The Story of Jytrimillya!

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WHETHER HE IS CONVICTED OR ACQUITTED OF ANY CRIME RELATED TO TRAYVON MARTIN, GEORGE ZIMMERMAN’S LIFE IS OVER REGARDLESS


Whether he is a cold-blooded murderer or simply a man who was justifiably protecting himself from harm or whether he is a die-hard racist or a man who simply made a negative remark without thinking because let’s face it, it does happen to all of us at one time or another, even if George Zimmerman doesn’t get charged with second degree murder or a hate crime or a civil lawsuit or any other charge that people can think of to throw at him to avoid a race riot, basically this man’s life is over.

And to me that’s sad.

People let’s face it, even though in Mr. Zimmerman’s case there is compelling evidence to suggest that he was indeed acting in self-defense (although in Mr. Martin’s defense I do believe that Mr. Zimmerman did instigate the scuffle that broke out between them) his life is still over in America and especially in  Black America.  (Because to most of Black America he will always be the ultimate symbol of injustice for blacks in the American legal system.)

For instance, if Mr. Zimmerman is ever convicted of one of the crimes that he will eventually be accused of and eventually goes to jail, he’ll have to deal with the black inmates of that prison either wanting to kill him or beat the shit out of him on a regular basis for what he did to Trayvon.

Or………………..

If Mr. Zimmerman is never charged with any crime related to the Trayvon Martin case he’ll still have to deal with the many angry black people all across America who think he got away with murder and alot of people in this case are not willing to let this issue go so Mr. Zimmerman’s only options in this case is to either go into hiding, move out of the country or get extensive plastic surgery which totally sucks!

It is unfortunately a no-win situation for this man all around.

So people always remember that on February 26th 2012, not only did a 17 year old black boy’s life end but a 28 year old white/hispanic man’s life ended as well.

And that’s a damn shame for both of them being so young and all.

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TWO BIRTHDAYS! A SONG WRITTEN BY TINA “KNOWLEDGEABLE” PEDEN


(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

(Verse 1)

I was born in Des Moines Iowa on April 13, you see,

With lungs that would rival the biggest banshee,

Took me eight years to remember a birthday, oh golly gee,

And eight seconds to know one was not nuff for this girly,

(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

(Verse 2)

After alot of thinking I discovered the key,

Have a birthday every six months rather simple really,

Double the cake, balloons, presents, merriment, oh whoopee,

Who cares about getting old, two birthdays for the rest of my life I definitely foresee,

(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

(Verse 3)

My second birthday is on October 13 near Halloween, boo, scary,

Orange pumpkins, black cats, graveyards and an old horror movie,

Jason, Spiders, Michael Myers thrill and scare the hell outta’ me,

I got two birthdays with my name in frosting on the cake marquee,

(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

(Verse 4)

So no matter whether you’re a human, animal, insect or tree,

You now have two birthdays just like everybody else and me,

Celebrate and enjoy every wonderful birthday memory,

Cause’ one day we will all die and won’t have this living luxury,

But don’t you fret but you accept what is to inevitably no doubt be,

Cherish this gift given to you by our God, your dad and your lovely mommy,

(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

(Verse 5)

So no more worries about whether you’re sick, have to work or some other emergency,

You now have two birthdays a spare blessing to your loved ones and to thee,

Always remember every living thing was born, a most certain guarantee,

And whether it is your wish to celebrate quietly or with people and cherries jubilee,

You not only have one but two birthdays to do whatever you please to any degree,

Cause’ it is your day to have tea, build a teepee, hold a jamboree, climb a tree, be totally carefree!

Oh hallelujah, praise God, oh how I truly love him, my family and good ol’ fabulous me!

It is my birthday and noone on this planet does it quite like me, oh glorious glee!

(Chorus)

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

Two birthdays, 1 – 2 – glee!

One birthday not nuff for me!

THIS IS TINA “KNOWLEDGEABLE” PEDEN WISHING ALL LIVING THINGS ON THIS BEAUTIFUL PLANET OF OURS A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

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WHY OH WHY WRITERS DID YAHOO HAVE TO DESTROY ASSOCIATED CONTENT?


When Yahoo purchased the content generating website Associated Content back in 2010 I personally knew that it was the end even if noone else knew it at the time. I mean a big-ass corporation like Yahoo buying a small-ass innovative up and coming company like Associated Content and destroying it was inevitable.

Yahoo proudly claims that ever since they bought Associated Content the quality of the writing from their writers has gotten better but for all of you people not in the know, that is total bullshit! The only people it has gotten better for is the executive staff at Yahoo. It’s barely conceivable to me at times that Yahoo has single-handedly destroyed the creative process on Associated Content in such a short period of time.

For example, in the golden years of Associated Content one of the luxuries bestowed on a AC writer was the ability to have his new content published immediately after three of his or her previous works had been previously published thereby instilling in their writers a sense of trust, freedom and flexibility that makes the creative process heavenly flow but now thanks to those idiots at Yahoo that unfortunately is no more because every single piece of content that a writer composes is reviewed by a totally incompetent lame-ass content manager and sometimes it takes that totally incompetent lame-ass manager two long-ass weeks to get around to reviewing the content which totally sucks! I mean heaven forbid if a new article is put up immediately on Associated Content that is not deemed good enough to generate Yahoo a shitload of money or may offend one of its precious advertisers!

People i’ll tell you that when the late great vocalist, Freddie Mercury of the kick-ass rock group Queen once sang, Another One Bites The Dust, who the hell knew that he would be referring years later to the creative downfall of the once glorious website, Associated Content!

So to all of you greedy corporate bastards at Yahoo Voices which the company is now called (By the by dudes and dudettes, the name Associated Content was much better) I want to take the time to say that you guys and dolls totally suck! And shame on you for ruining the creative process at the formerly glorious website known as Associated Content! You oughtta be sooo ashamed of yourselves! I mean even if the great writer Jane Austen was alive and totally starving and had no other means to make money other than on your website i’ll tell ya’ even she wouldn’t go near your crappy corporatized website!

Anyhoo, I also want to take the time to thank you for being everything that a greedy stereotypical corporation is. Thank you, thank you, thank you for being the Wall Street/Gordon Gekko of this new decade and thereby only caring about your fat wallets and not caring if you screw the little guy (Your writers and their creativity) in the process. You guys truly are corporate pigs! Gordon Gekko would be so proud of you! Yahoo, you have truly proven that greed is good!

I said it before and i’m going to say it again, Yahoo you totally suck! And I want to implore you if ever in the future you are thinking of pulling a “Google” meaning thinking of opening up a “Adsense” kind of program, for the love of God please don’t! At the rate that you are going you will muck that up too! So please don’t even start the madness! Oh, i’m sorry! You already did and it’s called Yahoo Publisher.  Forgive me!  Update:  But you also mucked up your Google Adsense ripoff program and ended it in 2010 which is no surprise.

(Loud-ass snicker!)

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MONEY MAKING IDEAS FOR KIDS: HEY YOUNGINS, DON’T OPEN UP A LAME OL’ LEMONADE STAND TO MAKE SOME CASH INSTEAD OPEN UP A GOLD BY THE INCH STAND!


Hey parents, do you have children between 7-17 years old who are always asking or constantly pestering you for money?

Hey parents, do you have enterprising youngsters who want to start their own businesses but are much too advanced for a lemonade stand?

Hey parents, do you have a teenager who is seriously discouraged by his current fast food, movie theatre or if you live in Iowa, detassling job choices?

Hey parents, would you like to teach your children a duel lesson? Lesson one about the value of money and lesson two actually provide your children with a way to earn money?

Well parents, I strongly suggest that you take some of that hard earned money that you have hidden away in an old tube sock in the back of your sock drawer or use a portion of your federal tax return money and spend a couple of hundred dollars and purchase your child a Gold By The Inch business of their very own.

For some of you parents who don’t know what Gold By The Inch is, let me fill you in.

GoldbytheInch.com is a full service wholesale only website for resellers of lifetime guarantee gold by the inch and rhodium by the inch jewelry chain sold on spools. They stock more than 230 styles of overlay gold by the inch, over 1200 charm styles and a beautiful line of cubic zirconia pendants and bracelets. This jewelry business opportunity is easily operated by one person, is extremely easy to learn and you can make money the very first weekend. Expect profit margins of 300-700% on every easy sale that you make.

With a Gold By The Inch Business young people will have the ability to make popular items that their peers will like such as bracelets, necklaces, anklets, bikini chains, cellphone chains, pet collars, eyeglass and sunglass safety chains, boot and shoe jewelry and many more. Since the chain is sold on spools young people have the ability to make any size chain for any purpose and you don’t have to invest in large quantities of ready made chains to do it. You also have the peace of mind that every chain sold is supported by GBTI’s written lifetime replacement guarantee.

Gold By The Inch sells extremely well at fairs, festivals, flea markets, malls, school events and parties which are places that most young people love anyway. Gold By The Inch has everything that a young person needs to start their very own business for a very small investment. Gold By The Inch has proudly provided quality product and service to vendors since 1985.

Parents, I ain’t gonna lie to you, Gold By The Inch chains are by no means on the same level of gold chain that you would find at fine stores like Bloomingdales, Tiffanys or Saks but for your everyday run of the mill teenager or young person it is good enough. For more info click on Gold By The Inch.

For both young people and parents there are many advantages to a parent buying their child a Gold By The Inch Business and below are just a few:

-Young people can make their own money and buy their own clothes, cars, concert tickets, fast food products or sock some of the money away for their college education without having to constantly keep asking their parents for money thereby giving them a sense of independence and pride.

-Parents, in exchange for you buying your child their very own Gold By The Inch Business you can make a deal with your child to give between 10-25% to the household to pay for expenses such as bills, family vacations, their college education or even lining your own or spouse’s pocket with a little extra cash to do with it whatever you please.

-When buying your child a Gold By The Inch Business you are also providing them with a unique tool to be popular which is something deep down that every young person wants. Parents let’s face it, when other youngsters see your child with their own Gold By The Inch business and the money that they are making at cool places like school events and festivals some youngsters will no doubt look up to them, want to be their friend and aspire to be like them thereby opening up their own businesses. Imagine your child the ultimate popular role model!

-Parents, be prepared to receive some mad respect from your offspring because by buying them a Gold By The Inch Business you are saying quite clearly that you want them to have a fun profitable “career” and not just a “job.”

-Gold By The Inch Businesses teach youth real life responsibility as well.

So parents don’t delay! Go out and buy your child a fun and profitable Gold By The Inch Business today!

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